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gonetorust

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all alone in space and time

there's nothing here but what here's mine

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Created on 2011-12-21 05:29:14 (#1150372), last updated 2012-01-01 (698 weeks ago)

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About

Name:	Brian
Birthdate:	Nov 10

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BASICS

Name: Brian
Age:17181920 21
Birthday: November 10th, 606
Zodiac: Scorpio
Family:Father // Erik [53], Mother // Alana [deceased], Brothers // Rafe [31], Ewan [28], Neil [24]
Class: Swordfighter -> Swordmaster
Country:Citizen of // Dentoria, Currently at // Eblar, Dentoria
Languages: Trade, Dentorian [Fluent]
Weapon Proficiencies Sword [Preferred], Unarmed.
Theme:"Every You, Every Me" - Placebo

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HISTORY

Brian was born the youngest child of a blacksmith living in the outskirts of Eblar. His mother died of an illness when he was five, something that people say his father never recovered from to this day. He was left in the care of his much older brothers, in the broadest sense of the word: to them, looking after their little brother was a troublesome little chore that they could only afford the least possible effort. Besides, if he was going to be a real man, he was going to have to know how to look after himself. And that meant being able to take whatever intimidation, criticism, and harassment they cared to give him. Their father was much too absorbed in his work to notice his sons' treatment of their brother. Brian grew up lonely, bitter, angry, with exceedingly low self-esteem and a malicious temper, who desired nothing more than escape from his monotonous life, to make something of himself.

A visit to the seamstress as a child one day brought an unexpected result. The young daughter of the seamstress, Emma, took a real liking to him. She started following him around, cooking him meals, waiting for him outside the shop whenever he went out. It became clear that she thought the world of him. And Brian had never met anyone who expressly wanted to be his friend before. For some odd reason he still can't quite grasp, his opinion mattered to Emma, and he relished in it. He took her into his confidence, he told her his dreams, and loved her for how she ate up every word. But in time, Emma's smothering of him began to wear him out, and his temper surfaced. On his bad days, he can't stand her, he'll put her down, criticise her work, her looks, the way she talks, the way she eats, what she eats and watch her crumble without feeling any sort of remorse for what he had said. On his good days, he loves her and can't stand to see her out of his sight, he'll treat her like a lady and tell her all about his next scheme to get out of Eblar and see the world.

Yet, all his dreams are hindered by one fact. Brian's brothers are all either apprentices to other tradesmen, expected to take up their employer's businesses, or lowly ranked knights in the royal guard. Which meant that Brian, the only son without a set path, was expected to learn his father's trade and inherit the shop.

And in Dentoria, expectations might as well be set in stone.

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PERSONALITY

Brian is, above all, moody. In his happier moods, he is charming, considerate and devoted. In dark moods, he is sullen, selfish, and bitter, and spite and malice come as almost second nature to him. He harbors a strong resentment towards his father, his brothers, and the life he will be forced to lead. While his dreams and ambitions all centre around his desire for freedom, they are also sprinkled with an intense spite towards his family: he wants to show them all that he was worth something, he wants them to see that made something of himself despite their treatment of him, he wants to rub their stupid faces in his success.

On his bad days, he realises that despite all his dreams, none of them has yet to come true. That he has never come up with an easy way -- the effort to implement something more extensive would just be too much -- out of his situation. That maybe, he'll spend his entire life dreaming of something that will always be out of his reach. And he hates it. Hates himself. And the outlet for all of his hatred will almost invariably be Emma.

The abuse he inflicts on Emma is almost always emotional rather than physical, similar to the treatment he recieved from his brothers. When he suddenly has flashes of insight into how much he has hurt her, he hates himself all the more and then treats her worse. It's a cycle that appears never-ending.

There are things about Emma that bother him immensely, though he uses those same things for his advantage. He doesn't understand how she can love him, how she is so willing to give everything up for him, how she has centred her life utterly around him. And yet, there is nothng that strikes fear in him more than Emma not being with him. Without Emma, no one will care about him, he won't matter to anyone, no one will love him. No matter how many times he convinces himself otherwise, he can't bear the thought of life without Emma, and does everything he can to keep her close, and devoted to him. Always. Forever.

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APPEARANCE

Brian is a lean young man of average height. He has red hair and blue eyes and his face is thin and fine-featured, but he can be quite good-looking. He carries around a light sword he made himself, whatever good that does him.

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Like the naked leads the blind.
I know I'm selfish, I'm unkind.
Sucker love I always find,
Someone to bruise and leave behind.

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[Brian is another character played by megaera_inc for himitsu_sensou. His PB is Aya from Weiss Kreuz. Not mine.]